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Artist: Steely Dan
Album: Katy Lied

Kids if you want some fun
Mr. LaPage is your man
He's always laughing, having fun
Showing his films in the den
Come on, come on
Soon you will be eighteen
I think you know what I mean
Don't tell your mama
Your daddy or mama
They'll never know where you been
Everyone's gone to the movies
Now we're alone at last

Listen to what I say
He wants to show you the way
Right down the hallway with open arms
To teach you a new game to play
Come on, come on
Soon it will be too late
Bobbing for apples can wait
We know you're used to sixteen or more
Sorry we only have eight


Kids if you want some fun
See what you never have seen
Take off your cheaters and sit right down
Start the projection machine



by jones on 6/6/2008 1:37am
Steely Dan's ode to child molestation.
by dave on 1/20/2009 9:32am
Printed lyrics notwithstanding, it may be 'chinos', not cheaters.
by Satan on 2/9/2009 8:39pm
Mr LaPage is the MAN.....
by Terry C on 3/25/2009 11:47am
It's cheaters. Another word for glasses.

Lighten up, jones.
by stan on 9/9/2010 4:21pm
actually quite disturbing lyrics for such an innocent sounding song. love the key change in the verse though. key change = good, child molestation = bad.
by Linda on 9/15/2010 10:15pm
This song is not about a child molester. The young girl in question was 17, and in love with Mr. LaPage. The guys in Steely Dan were in the living room watching movies when the young lady came over to visit. Not as bad as it sounds - I know because I was the young lady in question.
by steverino on 2/13/2012 8:14pm
The lyrics say cheeta's which was a popular children's shoe in the early seventies.
by Mell on 4/19/2012 4:56pm
Were you now, Linda?
by Bugs on 10/15/2012 1:41pm
Steely Dan did a lot of songs about odd, borderline characters. Mr. LaPage (the fictional one, not the real guy Linda refers to) is just one of them. Let's not forget "Cousin Dupree" and the guy from "Janey Runaway." Just because they depict strange people doesn't mean they advocate strange behavior.
by Harris Witherden on 3/19/2015 1:16pm
My LaPage is my man ;-)
by Dot Paolo on 12/16/2018 4:18am
I knew Mr. Lapage and it was Lepage and he was not french. Who is Linda?

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